Family and Stuff
by SomewhereBeyondReality
Summary: "People say my family aren't normal but that's ok with me." A sample of Erica Bing's homework assignment. Post Series. Hints of Mondler, Ross/Rachel, Phoebe/Mike and Joey/Alex.


**Title:** Family and Stuff  
**Author**: SomewhereBeyondReality  
**Rating**: K  
**Summary:** "People say my family aren't normal but that's ok with me." A sample of Erica Bing's homework assignment. Post Series. Hints of Mondler, Ross/Rachel, Phoebe/Mike and Joey/Alex.  
**Disclaimer:** Could I _be _any further from owning Friends?  
**A/N:** Takes place seven years after the finale. Assume all the other Friends moved to the suburbs as well. I've mentioned Joey is married to Alex who, if you didn't know, was his love interest in the spin-off series. (I've never watched it properly because my poor, fragile heart was so broken from Friends finishing but I know he ends up with her: my head canon is they got married and come back to New York). Oh, and Monica and Chandler managed to have children naturally because I could never get over how bitterly unfair it was. On the baby note I've found in tons of After Season 10 fics the names people give to the Friends kids are really pretentious and awkward with weird spelling. (Is that just me? Anyone?) So I've tried to be really careful with naming all the Friend's offspring, Phoebe's kids are the names she had planned in Season 9 (just assume Mike being the laid-back chap he is, was cool with that) and Monica and Chandler's son has her 'perfect name' mentioned when Emma was born and all of the other kids mentioned are named after existing characters. So now with an insanely long authors note for a short story, let us begin!

**Essay Subject: **My Family

By Erica Bing (Mommy and Daddy helped a lot).

**Name: **_Erica Bing_

**Age: **6 ½

**Daddy: **Chandler M. Bing (But he won't tell me what the M stands for and Mommy laughs when I ask).

**Mommy: **Monica Elizabeth Geller Bing

**Brother(s): **Jack and Daniel Bing

**Sister(s): **Mommy's Baby-Girl bump (She doesn't have a name cos she's not born yet).

**Grandparents: **Grandpa Jack and Nana Judy, Grandma Nora and Grandmommy/Granddaddy Charles. (He changes).

**Uncle(s): **Ross, Joey, Mike

**Aunt(s): **Rachel, Phoebe, Alex

**Cousin(s): **Emma and Monica Geller (oh and Ben but he's Willick something and lives with my daddy's ex-wife Carol and her wife Susan). Mike, Joseph and Sophie Hannigan. Alexandria and Phoebo Tribbiani.

**Other: **Mummy said you wouldn't want me to put Uncle Joey and Aunt Phoebe's families as 'family' cos they're not related to us. But Daddy said they're like our family even if we don't share blood. So that counts and you and the other teachers can't mark me down.

**Where does your family live:**

My family live in a big house with a back yard and swing and place to ride our bikes.

My aunties and uncles and cousins always come to our house and steal food from our fridge. Daddy says he and Mommy moved house to stop them doing it but everyone followed them.

Uncle Joey and Aunt Alex live across the road and Aunt Phoebe/Uncle Mike, and Aunt Rachel/Uncle Ross live a few streets away. (But in opposite ways). Mommy says soon I can walk to their houses on my own. We also have a Joey room in our house, but Uncle Joey says it's not as cool as he wanted. I think it's cool cos it got a foosball table in it and I'm good at foosball.

We kind of have another house. But it's not a house, it's an apartment (did I spell it right?) in New York City. Mommy and Daddy and lots of my Aunties and Uncles used to live in it. (Not all at the same time, that would be silly!) Jack and me lived in it too before we moved here. Uncle Joey bought it a few years ago so we could stay there when we go to New York. (Well that's why Uncle Joey say's he got it. Daddy says he got it cos he's a big girl and hated other people living in it. But Uncle Joey can do stuff like that, cos he's a rich TV star).

The apartment is super-cool. It's pretty with purple walls and a balcony. Normally just me and Mommy and Jack and Daniel and Baby-Girl-Bump stay there, but one time all the Aunties and Uncles and cousins went to the city at the same time (Mommy called it 'poor planning') and we had to share. It was very, very, very, very, very squashed. We had bunk beds in the spare room and people all over the floor. Mommy and Daddy were on the balcony (Daddy said he didn't mind cos it brought back 'good memories'). Uncle Joey even slept on the toilet! But it was fun. Like a slumber party. We had breakfast in this place called Central Perk, and this nice man called Gunther gave me a muffin.

**What does your family like to do:**

We don't go to the city much but on weekends everyone comes over to play and the grown-ups drink coffee. Sometimes we go to Uncle Joey's but normally people come to our house. Mommy says its cos she's the best hostess, Aunt Rachel says its cos our house is the biggest and Daddy says its cos of Mommy's cooking. (She cooks real good). We play games like bamboozled (it's complicated) and foosball and spin the bottle and 'clean up' (that's Mommy's favourite game).

**Describe your parents:**

Daddy is really fun and Mommy always takes care of me. They are very mushy, like kissing in front of me and Jack and Daniel. I think my Mommy and Daddy kiss more than most Mommy and Daddy's. Even my cousin Emma says they have something 'extra special'. I asked Daddy and Mommy why, and they said it was because they make each other happy. Daddy says he didn't know what real happiness was before he met Mommy. I can't imagine Daddy not being happy, cos he always smiles and make everyone laugh. Mommy said its cos because Daddy is as an a-m-a-z-i-n-g man and helps her to not be too serious and grumpy.

Uncle Joey said they are happy cos they have fun in bed. I don't know what he meant, bed is kind of boring. But Mommy and Daddy wouldn't let him say what he meant.

**Describe your siblings:**

I have two brothers. Jack who is my twin and Daniel who is 3. As soon as Mommy's Baby-Bump is born I will have a sister. I hope it will happen soon cos I don't want to be the only girl. I asked Mommy and Daddy if I was a bump in Mommy's tummy once but they said no. Jack and me were bumps in someone else's tummy and they a-d-o-p-t-e-d us. (Daddy spelt it for me). Cos they thought they couldn't have kids. Then they had Daniel, and now Baby Girl Bump. But they said they love me and Jack just as much and we'll always be their first children. They are glad Daniel didn't come til later cos they got us. They said Daniel and Girl-Bump are special cos they grew them inside, but we are special cos Mommy and Daddy _chose _us. So we're all equal special. Mommy and Daddy are very worried about us being equal special. I don't know why, we all know they love us the same.

Mommy says they worry cos Nana Judy was mean and loved Uncle Ross more than her. That made her sad. She doesn't want us to feel like that. I don't like Nana Judy. Daddy says its cos Grandma Nora and Grandmommy Charles didn't look after him well and he was lonely. So he wants us to know how much he loves us and he'll always be here and won't make us take the Janitor to Parents Day or send us to boarding school. (Why would we do that?)

**Any other things about your family:**

My Mommy and Daddy are weird but I love them. People say my family and all my cousins and aunts and uncles aren't very normal but that's ok.

I have to stop now, Mommy is yelling. She says Girl Baby Bump is coming out. All my Aunties and Uncles are coming in to help. Aunt Phoebe and Aunt Rachel are fighting over who gets to go to the hospital and who will stay and look after us. Uncle Ross is saying we need to go NOW. Uncle Joey is packing food, but I don't think we need _that_ many sandwiches. Daddy looks all freaked but he's staying by Mommy and holding her hand. That's nice of him cos she's squeezing hard.

I'd better go, it's too noisy to write, but I think my family is great. Who wants normal?

**X-X**

**Note: **Yeah...that was probably too advanced for a six year old. I'm sure I wasn't writing that well in Primary school. Let's just say Monica and Chandler are dedicated parents when it comes to homework help and Erica is bright little cookie. Ok? But that's a lazy way of writing by After Friends Canon without an in-depth story. And please review, do you know how depressing it is looking at the story stats and only like 1 in 100 of you guys review?


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